Counting your eggs before they hatch

Yesterday I went for a scan with my obstetrician.

The goal was to see how many eggs we'd managed to get lined up via all my various drugs. This guys is pretty good, expectation wise, we knew going in that we were likely to not have too many due to my AMH profile.

I think he was even being nicer to me that day than usual. The scan itself was pleasant even - well, compared to your average pap smear for example.
At the end of the day though - we didn't get as many eggs as we wanted.

He said it was up to my partner and I if we wanted to continue with the cycle but advised us that it probably wouldn't yield favourable results. Then of course, you have to pay the fertility clinic as veritable butt tonne of money no matter if you end up up the duff or not.

Which leads us to now postponing this cycle and trying again next month maybe.

Backhanded Apoloblog

Alright, so I was all ready to make an apology post to the fertility clinic because when I visited them last month to get my baggy of drugs and sit through a stabby tutorial (including fake skin pouch) I got a wonderful welcome.

"Hi Lucky Tiger! How *are* you today? Great! Come right this way, the nurse is waiting for you. Oh, how about that lottery winner on the news, huh?"

I left with lovely patterned bags of drugs, confidence and a free bottle of water.
They said 'Let us know when your period starts so we can update our records and arrange for egg collection."

So, the first business day of my period I called them to let them know, but spent nearly all of my tea break on hold. I managed to get through to the receptionist but she said a nurse would have to speak to me. That's fine and dandy, but I have to get back to work.

                                      

They said they'd get someone to call me back and I asked if it would be okay if they called me at 11:00 am, my next break so I'd be available. Sure! They said. I go back to work, where mobiles are verboten.

On my next break, I turn my phone on, and I have a missed call and a voicemail, timed about ten minutes after I spoke to the receptionist at 9:30 am. The voicemail just said 'Hi... you called. Call us back.' Which grinds my gears because I've just wasted my phone dimes calling my voicemail box when they didn't need to leave a message and I'd told them I wouldn't be able to take a call.

Adventures of a Human Porcupine

So we're actively counting the days now until we can start an actual cycle and I'm excited, nervous, and yes, kinda impatient. I'm also not looking forward to becoming a human pin cushion but what can ya do, eh?

Well, today was the day it begun. My friend had offered to help with the needles as she'd been through it before, but I'd gone through it all with the nurses so I was fairly confident with what to do. I'd been told to do it early, and at a consistent time so I woke hubby up early because I wanted someone there in case I did mess up but I thought it I had too much fuss or people around then I might freak out.

I know I shouldn't complain. Both of my grandmothers and my paternal grandfather have had to use needles everyday for Diabetes or what have you, so there's no reason I should get so worked up about needles for a couple of weeks, right?

Childhood Memories

So this week at family dinner, the topic switched to child behaviours and nightmares and some old memories were discussed.

My mother recalled that my elder sister would always try to stay up as long as she could, I was always easy to get to sleep as a child but my younger brother was an absolute terror when it came to nap-time. Dad mentioned that one time he checked in on my sister - it was 11pm and she was sitting up singing 'la la la la la' to herself. Of course, her battle to stay up all hours backfired on her too, like one time she fell asleep during dinner and face-planted into her food.

We got onto nightmares, and mum mentioned that on our first trip to Australia (I was about three then) my grandfather found a set of oven mitts that looked like a crocodile's jaws and came at me with them - jokingly of course, but that night I screamed the house down apparently, yelling incoherently about crocodiles.

Probably something like this

I was also terrified of crabs and vividly remember my mum sighing and getting up off her deck chair at the beach so I could stand up on it for safety

What I saw

.
Of course, the crab just walked right past us both, ignoring us. Mum proved there was no risk, but I maintained my irrational fears for several years. I think it was to do with a book I had been given for my birthday (and I still own it, actually!) that had a rhyming section about crabs pinching ten different toes.

Probably what actually happened

Dinosaurs, cake, feelings and parties

Well my last post was a bit angry so hopefully this one will be a bit more upbeat.

Recently we went to a dinosaur themed 1st birthday and you better believe it was as cute as it sounds!

                                                  

We had super advanced notice so we were looking forward to it but also kinda apprehensive as well. 

Reason being.. we knew we were likely going to be the only people there without kids. 

This of course, was in fact the case bar one other couple. But it's a kid's party and not about us so of course we went and had a great time. It was kinda weird though, there were a few there that were old school chums that we tried to catch up with but every-time a conversation started it was immediately interrupted by a child saying something, doing something, or not being seen in the nearby vicinity and therefore likely up to no good. 

Error 404: Child not found

Another thing was that we weren't too sure what to do with ourselves or where to stand without getting in a kiddies warpath.

Clinical Rage and Other Maladies

So right now I just need to have a bit of a rant about my day.

I had finally taken care of allllll the paperwork for the fertility clinic (seriously, I think I've seen less paperwork when I was in school and the questions were probably easier there too) and I asked them... where to from here?

I mean, every time I think I know what I'm doing I find out I had it wrong or there's some other step I have to take first and it's frustrating. So it's a genuine question. I do not have the time, or the money, or the intent... to take this concept of baby producing lightly, and I can't afford in ANY respect to mess it up. I'm trying my best not to be stupid, but I'm getting overwhelmed, and then I lose confidence in myself. 

The clinic staff said.. go and see your specialist for the next part. Alrighty then, I thought and made an appointment for the next available day I had off. This was today. 

My specialist bluntly asked me what I was doing there. 

Disney Mothers

Okay, let's face it - mothers and parents in general usually get a bum rap in Disney movies. They're absent or barely involved, deceased, adoptive and abusive or flat out murdered.
There are many theories about this and most of them are aimed at mommy issues, which as well as being insensitive is frankly untrue.

Most Disney stories are tales of growing up and finding yourself and most of the characters find themselves in unusual or dangerous situations that hey, probably wouldn't happen if the parents were around and doing their job.

Now that said, there are some awesome parents in the Disney-verse and here are some of my favourite Disney mothers in no particular order.